Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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