I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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