So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Terrible idea I love it
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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