Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
