So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Farmville is her only friend.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
