just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
