Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
