Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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