didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
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