So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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