Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Randomize
