Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize