wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
only if we run a train.
done.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
