PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
so much tequila, so little girl.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize