I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
