Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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