Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
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