I wish my penis had an off switch
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
You made out with two different species that night
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I can't turn off my feet"
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize