I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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