i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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