Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
