I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
