How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
We are two peas in an std pod
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize