You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
