Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
organizing the empties. That sober.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I need moral support for this bender
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
