Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
