it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
