Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
