i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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