I bet he comes in French.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
