I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
