Where did you get a picture of my penis
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
