I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize