Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
