you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I would fuck him just for his dog
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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