I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
