is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Mom said you looked used
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
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