I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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