Don't make out with my wife yet
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
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