you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
