Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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