When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
