he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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