she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
