gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
