You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
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