nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
