I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
