I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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