Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
You left your underwear on the fireplace
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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