She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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