ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
